Weddings and Elopements — How to Get Legally Married
Weddings are one of life’s most joyous occasions. And elopements are even cooler—in my humble opinion—because it’s all the fun of a wedding day multiplied by an outdoor adventure!
But then there’s all that legal stuff—that boring, complicated, and scary legal stuff, right? I know it’s a bit intimidating, but to be honest, getting legally married ain’t all that bad. If it was, there’d be a lot fewer married people.
Let’s walk through all the need-to-know details for you and your fiancé to be lawfully married.
Don’t You Want Somebody to Love
First things first, you have to find that special someone. Take a quick moment to look at them and realize, “Wow, I found somebody in the world I love enough to marry. And better yet, I found someone willing and eager to marry me!”
That’s a special thing. It takes a lot of luck and dedication to make a relationship work. So, if you’ve done that, the legal stuff is going to be a breeze. Just wanted to build your confidence before we continue.
Getting Your Marriage License
Up next, you’ll need to obtain a marriage license from the local county clerk-recorder’s office. If you’re getting married in-state, this can be your own local office. But if you’re traveling, you’ll likely need to get it from the county you’re getting married in.
This poses some challenges for traveling couples. You’ll need to get and use the marriage license within 90 days, which means you might need to travel to your wedding location a few days early to pick it up together on a weekday.
Once you’ve chosen the right office, you’ll need to book an appointment for you both to go in together and pick up the license. Of course, every county is different, so make sure to look up what requirements your local county has. Depending on the location, you might even be able to do this online.
Interestingly enough, you can finalize your marriage right then and there if you choose. All it takes is your personal information, an oath (“I do”), and you’re good to go. You can still have a ceremony later, of course. This is totally up to you. Confused about why people would get married right then and there? Check out our blog on commitment ceremonies!
If you choose to finalize the marriage at the ceremony, that’s A-OK. Just bring your paperwork to your wedding day for your officiant to sign. Your officiant and witness(es) will sign the document. You’ll then need to return it to the county clerks office. Bonus—if you hire our officiant, we do that part for you so there’s one step taken off your plate.
This brings us to selecting your officiant…
Selecting Your Officiant
Odds are you’ve been to a wedding before or you’ve at least seen one on TV. At every ceremony, there’s a person who stands at the altar, conducts the ceremony, and pronounces the couple married. That person is known as the officiant.
While officiating a wedding is a sacred and special duty, it’s incredibly easy to find or become an officiant. As a couple, you might have a religious leader, family member, or friend who you think would be perfect to officiate your wedding. That’s awesome! Having someone you already enjoy a connection with makes the ceremony all the more special.
If your chosen officiant is a religious leader, they’re almost certainly prepared to conduct your ceremony. It’s part of the job description.
If you’d prefer a friend or a family member, that’s totally cool. Know they will need to become ordained in order to officiate your wedding. More on that below.
PS—did you know you can marry yourself without an officiant in certain states? Self-solemnization is an option in Colorado, Pennsylvania, Montana, Kansas, Illinois, and D.C. And you can even do so in these states with a religious exemption: Wisconsin, Nevada, Maine, and California.
What If I Can’t Find an Officiant?
Don’t have anybody in mind? No matter. Love & Latitudes Wedding and Elopement Photography has an officiant on staff. This is especially helpful for elopements and small adventure weddings. We are comfortable conducting religious or secular ceremonies.
Just let us know that you need an officiant when booking your photographer. We’ll set up a second call to chat through your preferences and work to personalize your ceremony.
Getting Ordained
So, you have someone picked out. That’s great! Unless they are already ordained, they’ll need to go through the process.
There are several websites where they can get ordained online. Personally, we like the Universal Life Church because it’s easy, widely recognized, and we agree with their principles. As stated on their website: “The ULC has only two core tenets that ministers must uphold: (1) Do only that which is right. (2) Every individual is free to practice their religion however they like as long as their actions do not impinge upon the rights or freedoms of others and are in accordance with the law.” That last point is important to us. Everyone has the right to get married—regardless of religion, sexuality, gender, or anything else.
To get ordained by ULC, they’ll need to fill out some personal information on the website, press submit, and check their email inbox for confirmation. Boom! It’s that simple.
Performing a Legal Wedding: Easy as 1-2-3
Once your friend or family member is ordained, performing a legal ceremony is nice and straightforward:
Double-check your state laws. They may have to prove to their state that they are ordained to officiate the wedding. It’s usually just a little extra paperwork and confirming personal information.
Hosting the ceremony. This is the fun part. Your officiant can talk about you as a couple, your history together, exchange rings, and ask you to share vows. Keep in mind that for a marriage to be legally binding, the officiant MUST include a declaration of intent (“do you take” and “I do”) from both parties and a pronouncement (“I now pronounce you…”). Everything else is optional and customizable.
Filling out the marriage license. Remember that marriage license we talked about earlier? Yup, that one. Fill out the paperwork with names, addresses, dates, signatures of the couple—all that goodness. Depending on the state, you might also need the signatures of one or two witnesses (your photographer can act as a witness). And finally, the signature of your officiant. This form can be mailed (by anyone) to the county clerk-recorder’s office or delivered in-person by either the couple or the officiant.
And that’s it! A bit of paperwork, a few magic words—and you are officially married.
Last But Not Least—Witnesses!
Can I get a witness? Yes you can! Or at least, you’re legally required to.
Most states require witnesses to watch the ceremony and sign the marriage license. For example, California requires 1 witness but gives you the option of having 2. Witnesses can be any age, so long as they are “old enough to know that they are witnessing a marriage ceremony AND be able to sign their name on the official marriage license.”
For couples eloping with friends and family, witnesses are easy to come by. But for couples who have true elopements with no guests, you might be wondering how to find a witness. The easy answer for a place like California is have your photographer sign as a witness, since the officiant cannot be a witness. But in places like Arizona that require 2 witnesses, you might need to ask a stranger to sign! Yes, we’ve done it before.
Love & Latitudes Wedding and Elopements
Love & Latitudes believes in giving you the perfect wedding day. We hope this guide clears up some of the legal stuff for you, so you can focus on the excitement of getting married.
Ready to book your wedding photographer or add-on an officiant? Reach out to Love & Latitudes Wedding and Elopements today!
Written by Isiah
I'm Isiah, business manager and officiant for Love & Latitudes. While I handle most of the behind the scenes work, I sometimes accompany Diana and our couples during photoshoots to help with whatever is needed. I am also an ordained wedding officiant (ULC) and am eager to officiate elopements and wedding ceremonies for our couples.
